“Too much talk leads to
sin. Be sensible and keep your mouth shut.” Proverbs 10:19 New Living Translation
In this time of
Thanksgiving, we often reflect on the kindness of people in our lives. We look
back on the encouraging and inspiring things that friends and loved ones have
spoken to us, and we treasure them. I’d like to write about the kindness of
little things that were left unsaid. I’m often grateful for those who keep
their mouth closed, and only think what they might have said. Sometimes not
hearing something encourages us more.
I’m grateful for: The
teachers who never questioned me on Back to School Night as to why my daughter
wore one black and one pink high top tennis shoe. (Who knew it was an eighth
grade act of rebellion?)
The music professor
who never said, “I don’t think you have it, Roth.” to me, a struggling voice
student. (However, once she did shout out, “I didn’t think you had it in you,
‘Roth.’” when I finally hit the perfect note.)
The newlywed husband
who never commented on the chest of drawers I painted a hideous bright coral
color. or the hideous turquoise and yellow rug I hooked for two years to go
with the coral colored furniture.
The husband who
painfully, but silently, endured taste-testing strange gourmet recipes containing eggplant mouvelle cuisine, or another companywhere I handed them the wrong application when applying for work. She even went on to hire me.
Finally, I’m grateful
for a family that believes in leaving some things unsaid . With a writing
career paved with rejection slips, I’ve had moments when I whine and complain.
Fortunately I’ve been blessed with a supportive family. Many times they might
have asked, “Why are you still writing?” They didn’t. They kept their comments
on “mute” and, good or bad, I’m still at it.
Maybe this Thanksgiving you and I can reflect
on those who had the good sense to keep their mouths closed. We salute those
who bit their tongue when we looked uncool, foolish, or lacking in taste. In
our culture, we undervalue kindness and self control, two character traits that
smooth over our interactions with people. Full disclosure is good for financial
statements, but rough on relationships. Better to leave things unsaid. Down the
road, someone will thank you for it.
I haven't thought of it that way, but you are so right. Sometimes the most sensitive, kind people say nothing at all. We should notice that more.
ReplyDeleteSo true, Jill. I who was born with too many words on my brain need to remember that.
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